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kelly_chamblissHere's my second drabble for ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
adventdrabbles. I was going to write something serious, but Albus took me on a detour down Crack!Fic Street. You can blame him.
Clearly I have too much time on my hands.
Title: All I Want for Christmas Is. . .
Character: Albus Dumbledore
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 200 (according to AO3)
Prompt of the Day: an unwanted gift
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Every Boxing Day, Albus Dumbledore did his duty of the season: he sent a large box -- anonymously -- to a Muggle charity.
The box was full of socks.
Woollen socks, yes, but magical, too. With anti-itch runes and no-hole charms and warming spells woven in. The Muggles who eventually bought them never knew why their feet stayed so toasty or why the heels never wore out, but they did know that their Oxfam socks were by far the best they'd ever owned.
Albus received the socks (dozens of pairs) as holiday gifts, because he let all his friends and colleagues and well-wishers and sycophants believe that socks were just the thing he always wanted.
No need for anyone to know that the holiday gift he really craved was one he gave to himself: a weekend at Master Boris's Discreet S&M Club and Spa in Vladivostok.
A little bit of leather, a little bit of lash, a clamp or two, all topped off with a relaxing sauna and maybe -- if he were feeling particularly deserving -- Master Boris's "Naughty But Nice" yuletide special: a mud-mask facial and a full-body hot wax.
Now that was what Albus called a Christmas gift.
Happy Christmas, indeed.
adventdrabbles. I was going to write something serious, but Albus took me on a detour down Crack!Fic Street. You can blame him.Clearly I have too much time on my hands.
Title: All I Want for Christmas Is. . .
Character: Albus Dumbledore
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 200 (according to AO3)
Prompt of the Day: an unwanted gift
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Every Boxing Day, Albus Dumbledore did his duty of the season: he sent a large box -- anonymously -- to a Muggle charity.
The box was full of socks.
Woollen socks, yes, but magical, too. With anti-itch runes and no-hole charms and warming spells woven in. The Muggles who eventually bought them never knew why their feet stayed so toasty or why the heels never wore out, but they did know that their Oxfam socks were by far the best they'd ever owned.
Albus received the socks (dozens of pairs) as holiday gifts, because he let all his friends and colleagues and well-wishers and sycophants believe that socks were just the thing he always wanted.
No need for anyone to know that the holiday gift he really craved was one he gave to himself: a weekend at Master Boris's Discreet S&M Club and Spa in Vladivostok.
A little bit of leather, a little bit of lash, a clamp or two, all topped off with a relaxing sauna and maybe -- if he were feeling particularly deserving -- Master Boris's "Naughty But Nice" yuletide special: a mud-mask facial and a full-body hot wax.
Now that was what Albus called a Christmas gift.
Happy Christmas, indeed.