Snowflake Challenge, Day 7
Jan. 7th, 2014 07:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kelly_chamblissDay 7
In your own space, create a fanwork. A drabble, a ficlet, a podfic, or an icon, art or meta or a rec list. A picspam. Something.
This is a job for. . .Minerva Doll!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
The Muggle press was calling it a "Polar Vortex" -- a natural weather phenomenon that was essentially an arctic tornado, a mass of strong winds over the North Pole that could break apart and send frigid air into normally more-temperate areas. Currently, much of Canada and the United States was suffering, and even at Hogwarts, the mercury sat at minus ten degrees C.
But the Headmistress of Hogwarts knew that there was nothing normal about the so-called "Polar Vortex." Early that morning, an owl had summoned Minerva to an emergency meeting at the Ministry of the "Special Committee," a deliberately-vaguely-named group designed to deal with urgent problems facing the wizarding world. Consisting of herself, Minister Shacklebolt, Harry Potter (head of Magical Law Enforcement), Arthur Weasley (Muggle expert), and Mafalda Hopkirk (who had a well-deserved reputation as a problem-fixer), the Special Committee could never be sure what the next crisis would be; they knew only to expect the unexpected.
Today's "unexpected" was the news that the "Polar Vortex" was actually the work of that most hapless of Gryffindor old boys, Stan Shunpike. With a healthy assist from, of all people, Hagrid.
"I didn't know nothin' bad was going to happen," Stan protested, probably with truth. The things Stan didn't know were legion, including how to learn from his past mistakes. "This bloke, he said it were a love spell. It was going to make me irresponsible to women. He promised me."
"You're already as irresponsible as they come!" said Ron Weasley, who was present because he was the Auror who had rounded up Stan and Hagrid and brought them to the Ministry to. . ."assist with enquiries." That was the proper phrase, Minerva believed.
"I expect he means 'irresistible,' Mr Weasley," she corrected.
"Stan Shunpike was going to be irresistible to women? And he couldn't tell it was a con?" said Ron, incredulous. Arthur and Mafalda stifled laughs, but Minerva could see Potter shake his head at Weasley. Ronald might be a fine Auror, but he had never learnt much discretion, and Minerva suspected he must be something of a trial to Potter.
"Tell us about this 'bloke,'" said Kingsley, after a quelling glance at Ronald.
Stan looked rather helplessly at Hagrid, who obligingly spoke up. "We met him in a pub, Stan and me. The Wand and Warlock, in Glasgow. It ain't a dodgy place at all, Kings. . .I mean, Minister. And this bloke, he looked perfectly respectable, din't he, Stan? Nice clean cloak an' everything."
Stan nodded vigorously. "And he ordered Ogden's 25-Year -- that don't come cheap. He said he didn't normally share his spells, but he could see I was a trustworthy chap. . ."
"Tha's true," Hagrid agreed. "Tha's what he said, to the word. Said he hated to charge for it, but he had his costs to think of."
"R&D -- research and development," said Stan, obviously proud of his knowledge. "So I give him two galleon, and he give me the incantation. Said to face north and speak it loud and clear."
"And tha's what we done," said Hagrid. "I spoke it with Stan, jes' to be sure, like. Used his name, o' course. And then all of a sudden, it got terrible cold. I could see icicles in me beard."
"Yeah, we musta done it wrong," said Stan morosely. "All I got for the galleons was frozen nuts. . .ah, er, beggin' yer pardon, Headmistress. I guess women are just going to keep resisting me. "
And he burst into tears.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Minerva summoned Filius Flitwick, and together with Arthur and Mafalda, they analysed the spell. It was not a love spell at all, of course, but a variation on a deep-freeze charm. An old one, Filius said, and he suspected the wording had degraded a bit over the centuries. Add those changes to whatever errors Hagrid and Stan were bound to have made in their chanting, and the result -- a "polar vortex."
"But the majority of the air seems to be affecting Canada and the US," said Kingsley. "So why are all of us so cold?"
Filius gave a diplomatic little cough. "Well, we've been saying and thinking the words, too. So we've each become a human cold wave; we'll take these temperatures with us wherever we go. And I'm afraid the freeze is going to continue, for all of us, until we find a counter-spell. I'll stay here and work with Mafalda and Arthur."
Minerva would have liked to have stayed, too -- she had so little time for magical research these days -- but she needed to get back to Hogwarts. So she left the problem in the others' capable hands, and Apparated home.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
In her chilly rooms, Minerva quickly put on
her warmest robes, but even before she finished fastening her shoes, it was clear that these clothes would be insufficient. So she unpacked 
the winter cloak her grandmother had made her, which, in addition to being lovely, had warming charms knitted directly into the design. Grandmother had always felt that it was bad for your health to wear outside clothes indoors, but Minerva was a firm believer in the notion that circumstances altered cases. And just now, the circumstance of imminent hypothermia seemed to justify even wearing the cloak to bed, if she'd wanted to.
For good measure, she added
a cosy hat and muffler and took up her wand to cast a moveable warming charm around herself.
Her green shoes, though elegant, proved ill-suited to the cold, so she replaced them with
hardy, fur-lined boots.
Finally, she was ready to brave the corridors.
She conducted her usual pre-term check of the castle, but by mid-afternoon, Hogwarts was so cold that everyone had herded into the Great Hall. Only the Hall's eight giant, roaring fireplaces could make a dent in the chill, for the outdoor thermometer now read -20C. Luckily, the students weren't due back for another two days, but the staff looked miserable.
Minerva faced them. "Clearly, we cannot open the school until Filius and the others have found a way to cancel this rogue freezing spell. So I strongly suggest that all of you leave here tonight. Extend your holiday; go somewhere warm, outside the Vortex. As long as you keep expenses to a minimum, I'm sure I can persuade the Board to assume your travel costs. Since Hagrid and I are the source of the cold at Hogwarts, we will stay to look after things here."
No one lost any time in hurrying out of the Great Hall; even the eight huge fires were barely keeping the frigid air at bay. Soon only Rolanda Hooch remained.
"You, too, Ro. Haven't the Harpies started off-season training in the Bahamas? You could spend a few days there. Where it's warm."
Rolanda grinned. "I know of the perfect warm place, Headmistress," she said. "Our bed. With a few perpetual hot-water bottles and my Magic-Heat comforter, we'll be fine." She paused meaningfully, and then continued, "We'll have to take our clothes off, of course. It's a scientific fact that you share body warmth more efficiently when naked."
Minerva raised an eyebrow. "A scientific fact, is it?"
"Oh, yeah. Surprised you don't know that, Miss I-Took-a-Transfiguration-Science-First-at-Bridgeford-University."
"Well, then," said Minerva, beginning to smile. "Let's put that scientific training to good use. You have a hypothesis about the most efficient way to share body warmth. We need to test that hypothesis with a good experiment, don't you think?"
Ro's grin widened. "In other words, get naked in bed?"
"Madam Hooch, those are hardly scientific terms. I suggest we arrange a situation in which we can monitor galvanic skin response."
Ro snorted, but Minerva ignored her and extended an arm. "May I escort you to the laboratory?"
Arm in arm, they headed out of the Great Hall and up the chilly stairs.
Cold or no cold, Minerva was looking forward to
getting down to her scanties.
Then she and Rolanda would create a little vortex all their own.
In your own space, create a fanwork. A drabble, a ficlet, a podfic, or an icon, art or meta or a rec list. A picspam. Something.
This is a job for. . .Minerva Doll!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
The Muggle press was calling it a "Polar Vortex" -- a natural weather phenomenon that was essentially an arctic tornado, a mass of strong winds over the North Pole that could break apart and send frigid air into normally more-temperate areas. Currently, much of Canada and the United States was suffering, and even at Hogwarts, the mercury sat at minus ten degrees C.
But the Headmistress of Hogwarts knew that there was nothing normal about the so-called "Polar Vortex." Early that morning, an owl had summoned Minerva to an emergency meeting at the Ministry of the "Special Committee," a deliberately-vaguely-named group designed to deal with urgent problems facing the wizarding world. Consisting of herself, Minister Shacklebolt, Harry Potter (head of Magical Law Enforcement), Arthur Weasley (Muggle expert), and Mafalda Hopkirk (who had a well-deserved reputation as a problem-fixer), the Special Committee could never be sure what the next crisis would be; they knew only to expect the unexpected.
Today's "unexpected" was the news that the "Polar Vortex" was actually the work of that most hapless of Gryffindor old boys, Stan Shunpike. With a healthy assist from, of all people, Hagrid.
"I didn't know nothin' bad was going to happen," Stan protested, probably with truth. The things Stan didn't know were legion, including how to learn from his past mistakes. "This bloke, he said it were a love spell. It was going to make me irresponsible to women. He promised me."
"You're already as irresponsible as they come!" said Ron Weasley, who was present because he was the Auror who had rounded up Stan and Hagrid and brought them to the Ministry to. . ."assist with enquiries." That was the proper phrase, Minerva believed.
"I expect he means 'irresistible,' Mr Weasley," she corrected.
"Stan Shunpike was going to be irresistible to women? And he couldn't tell it was a con?" said Ron, incredulous. Arthur and Mafalda stifled laughs, but Minerva could see Potter shake his head at Weasley. Ronald might be a fine Auror, but he had never learnt much discretion, and Minerva suspected he must be something of a trial to Potter.
"Tell us about this 'bloke,'" said Kingsley, after a quelling glance at Ronald.
Stan looked rather helplessly at Hagrid, who obligingly spoke up. "We met him in a pub, Stan and me. The Wand and Warlock, in Glasgow. It ain't a dodgy place at all, Kings. . .I mean, Minister. And this bloke, he looked perfectly respectable, din't he, Stan? Nice clean cloak an' everything."
Stan nodded vigorously. "And he ordered Ogden's 25-Year -- that don't come cheap. He said he didn't normally share his spells, but he could see I was a trustworthy chap. . ."
"Tha's true," Hagrid agreed. "Tha's what he said, to the word. Said he hated to charge for it, but he had his costs to think of."
"R&D -- research and development," said Stan, obviously proud of his knowledge. "So I give him two galleon, and he give me the incantation. Said to face north and speak it loud and clear."
"And tha's what we done," said Hagrid. "I spoke it with Stan, jes' to be sure, like. Used his name, o' course. And then all of a sudden, it got terrible cold. I could see icicles in me beard."
"Yeah, we musta done it wrong," said Stan morosely. "All I got for the galleons was frozen nuts. . .ah, er, beggin' yer pardon, Headmistress. I guess women are just going to keep resisting me. "
And he burst into tears.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Minerva summoned Filius Flitwick, and together with Arthur and Mafalda, they analysed the spell. It was not a love spell at all, of course, but a variation on a deep-freeze charm. An old one, Filius said, and he suspected the wording had degraded a bit over the centuries. Add those changes to whatever errors Hagrid and Stan were bound to have made in their chanting, and the result -- a "polar vortex."
"But the majority of the air seems to be affecting Canada and the US," said Kingsley. "So why are all of us so cold?"
Filius gave a diplomatic little cough. "Well, we've been saying and thinking the words, too. So we've each become a human cold wave; we'll take these temperatures with us wherever we go. And I'm afraid the freeze is going to continue, for all of us, until we find a counter-spell. I'll stay here and work with Mafalda and Arthur."
Minerva would have liked to have stayed, too -- she had so little time for magical research these days -- but she needed to get back to Hogwarts. So she left the problem in the others' capable hands, and Apparated home.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
In her chilly rooms, Minerva quickly put on
her warmest robes, but even before she finished fastening her shoes, it was clear that these clothes would be insufficient. So she unpacked the winter cloak her grandmother had made her, which, in addition to being lovely, had warming charms knitted directly into the design. Grandmother had always felt that it was bad for your health to wear outside clothes indoors, but Minerva was a firm believer in the notion that circumstances altered cases. And just now, the circumstance of imminent hypothermia seemed to justify even wearing the cloak to bed, if she'd wanted to.For good measure, she added
a cosy hat and muffler and took up her wand to cast a moveable warming charm around herself.Her green shoes, though elegant, proved ill-suited to the cold, so she replaced them with
hardy, fur-lined boots.Finally, she was ready to brave the corridors.
She conducted her usual pre-term check of the castle, but by mid-afternoon, Hogwarts was so cold that everyone had herded into the Great Hall. Only the Hall's eight giant, roaring fireplaces could make a dent in the chill, for the outdoor thermometer now read -20C. Luckily, the students weren't due back for another two days, but the staff looked miserable.
Minerva faced them. "Clearly, we cannot open the school until Filius and the others have found a way to cancel this rogue freezing spell. So I strongly suggest that all of you leave here tonight. Extend your holiday; go somewhere warm, outside the Vortex. As long as you keep expenses to a minimum, I'm sure I can persuade the Board to assume your travel costs. Since Hagrid and I are the source of the cold at Hogwarts, we will stay to look after things here."
No one lost any time in hurrying out of the Great Hall; even the eight huge fires were barely keeping the frigid air at bay. Soon only Rolanda Hooch remained.
"You, too, Ro. Haven't the Harpies started off-season training in the Bahamas? You could spend a few days there. Where it's warm."
Rolanda grinned. "I know of the perfect warm place, Headmistress," she said. "Our bed. With a few perpetual hot-water bottles and my Magic-Heat comforter, we'll be fine." She paused meaningfully, and then continued, "We'll have to take our clothes off, of course. It's a scientific fact that you share body warmth more efficiently when naked."
Minerva raised an eyebrow. "A scientific fact, is it?"
"Oh, yeah. Surprised you don't know that, Miss I-Took-a-Transfiguration-Science-First-at-Bridgeford-University."
"Well, then," said Minerva, beginning to smile. "Let's put that scientific training to good use. You have a hypothesis about the most efficient way to share body warmth. We need to test that hypothesis with a good experiment, don't you think?"
Ro's grin widened. "In other words, get naked in bed?"
"Madam Hooch, those are hardly scientific terms. I suggest we arrange a situation in which we can monitor galvanic skin response."
Ro snorted, but Minerva ignored her and extended an arm. "May I escort you to the laboratory?"
Arm in arm, they headed out of the Great Hall and up the chilly stairs.
Cold or no cold, Minerva was looking forward to
getting down to her scanties. Then she and Rolanda would create a little vortex all their own.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-01-08 12:30 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2014-01-08 02:28 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2014-01-11 09:46 pm (UTC)Miss I-Took-a-Transfiguration-Science-First-at-Bridgeford-University.
That had me giggle quite hilariously ;)